6 more weeks, 6 more weeks, 6 more weeks! Yeah, that's not excitement or anything. Maybe just a little. Not gonna lie, the closer it gets and the more I sit and actually contemplate having a child of my own, the more I start to get nervous. Everyone has said it's a life changing moment and you'll never understand it until you experience it. I think about how much my life has changed already, and I can't even fathom the way I'm going to feel when I see Dominic for the first time. The reality is setting in more and more each day, and it's making me anxious. In a good way, but anxious nonetheless. With such a smooth pregnancy thus far, it's easy to assume that being a parent will be just as easy. But I know it won't be. Good thing I'm a fast learner and I'm more than ready for a challenge. Doctor says I've got a very active, healthy baby growing inside me so I have a feeling I'm going to have my hands full. Bring it on baby!
“Courage is the art of being the only one who knows you're scared to death.”
Things are still coming together quite nicely with both of my businesses,
TT's Attic and
The Alpha Omega Solution. When I first started my businesses I had no idea that being a business owner could be so time consuming and stressful at times. I had always been successful in my previous jobs as a stock broker and mortgage broker. I would start working for a company, figure out how things worked and quickly move up the ladder, often surpassing even my own expectations. But starting your own business is a COMPLETELY different ball game. There is no structure to figure out. There is no ladder to climb. And there are no asses to kiss. Because you create the structure, you build the ladder and it's your ass you want people to be kissing. When I have days where progress seems slow I remind myself that it's the small victories that matter and that will eventually get me to my goals. If I've come this far and learned so much in less than a years time, I can only imagine the great things in store for the future. At this point I can feel the pieces slowly moving together everyday. I'm sure I'll make more mistakes and get knocked down a few more times along the way, but trial and error is part of process. I'm no longer afraid of change. I will persevere.
Eventually I will be moving The Baby Mama Chronicles to a different location. I resisted the urge earlier to register a domain and start building a website. I promised myself I would not take on any additional projects until I finish some of the ones I'm already working on, although it's very tempting. My vision is to have a custom Baby Mama Chronicles website with a logo, photo gallery and blog. Hopefully by the end of the year I'll have it up and running, as it will be a great way for everyone to view updates and pictures of Dominic all in one place. Just another one of my many ideas coming soon to an interweb near you. Stay tuned!
I've been missing my BFF, Talese, a lot lately. I have missed her everyday since she left us but some days are worse than others. Her absence has felt a lot more noticeable this past week or so. Sometimes it's hard to be friends with other people after having her in my life because most people just don't measure up. Some days I look at other people and get so disappointed at their poor character, poor decisions and overall lack of caring for other people. But before I get too discouraged something always happens and I am reminded that there ARE still good people out there, even if they are rare. And I remember that even through all of her trials, Talese never got jaded or bitter. She kept right on loving more people and that's one of the things I loved most about her. She inspires me everyday to keep moving forward and to keep loving people even if they hurt me. Because when you find those rare people like her it makes putting up with all the other ones completely worth it!
I decided to break out of my shell and live a little on St Patty's Day. My mom watched Dominic for most of the night while I went to a good friend's birthday/St Patty's Day bash and then out for some drinks. Lets just say a male dancer, old friends and a fishbowl full of liquor make for an interesting night! I'm glad I went out and had some fun, but it was also a good reminder as to why I don't drink excessively anymore. I sure don't miss the hangovers and I'd much rather spend the time with my little man. I think I'll be good on the party front until my NYC trip to see Nickelback next month.
