My Little Turkey...

Happy early Thanksgiving! Tomorrow is my due date - I can not believe it! I really thought Dominic would be here by now - this entire pregnancy I felt like he would come early, but apparently he's nice and comfy and doesn't want to leave yet. Went to the doctors today and he said I'm only 1 cm dilated. So unless Dominic decides to come on his own they will be inducing me next Wednesday or Thursday. I have another appointment Monday to schedule the induction for one of those two days. Yee-haw! So in a weeks time I will FINALLY have little Dominic in my arms. I'm so excited, nervous, scared, elated and anxious all rolled into one. It will be interesting to see if he decides to make his debut before then or if we will have to force him out. They are already estimating his weight at over 8 lbs so I have a feeling he's going to be a big baby. And every time I go in for an ultrasound the techs laugh because they can see his little hair floating around in there. No bald baby for me! I just can't wait to see what he looks like. Hopefully I'm not forgetting anything in my 3 hospital bags that I packed (hey, wouldn't want to be stuck there without something!) because ready or not, here he comes...


"It was the tiniest thing I ever decided to put my whole life into."

Come Out, Come Out Wherever You Are...

I know it's been awhile with no update - I've been crazy busy the last few weeks and it doesn't look like life is about to slow down at all! To answer the big question - yes, Dominic is still hibernating. Today is exactly one week away from my due date. Where the hell have the last 9 months gone? This pregnancy has gone by so fast and easy I can hardly believe it. All those people who bitch and moan about how rough pregnancy is really make me wonder. Maybe I've just been lucky. After all, I never even did buy maternity clothes. The old rubber band around the button of my pants trick worked wonders. I will admit though, the last week or so I've become increasingly anxious. I just want him here. RIGHT MEOW. I'm done being patient.

Am I nervous about my impending due date? Pshhh, never. What's there to be nervous about? Giving birth to a 7 - 9 pound baby? That's a walk in the park. Going through a long labor with (hopefully) no pain medication? Bring it on. Bringing home a tiny little human that I'm going to be solely responsible for? I may or may not be fucking terrified.

For my baby shower one of my friends got me a "belly cast" to make a mold of my pregnant belly. I did it last weekend because who knows how much longer I'll be housing a baby. It's a cool little gift, but I don't know what to do with it now that it's done. I've got this mold of these giant boobs and belly sitting in my room and to be honest it's a bit creepy! I guess I'll put it in storage.

So for now I go back to waiting. I'm no good at this game. Guess I'll just continue life as usual in the meantime - still working everyday, still staying active and still daydreaming about holding the little baby living inside me for the past 9 months. Come on Dominic, I'm ready when you are!


"Q. My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A. Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current."

Happy Birthday to Me!

It's my birthday, it's my birthday - woo hoo! Actually this is the first birthday I can ever remember not celebrating the entire month, or at least week.  Last year I spent the day shopping, having lunch and drinks with friends and ending the night with some ever memorable karaoke, (I've posted a picture from last year's festivities). This year it just doesn't seem like I have enough time to set aside a whole week for celebrations. I have more important things to focus on - baby, work, upcoming non-profit events, etc. Regardless of my birthday plans or lack thereof, I can't believe I'm 24 already. It seems like just yesterday I was turning 18. Next year I'll be a quarter century old, man that sounds scary! Guess this year I'll just settle for an evening at home with family and cake, and possibly a girls night this Saturday after my baby shower. Maybe birthdays are overrated after all.

Less than 10 weeks left to go until Dominic makes his debut! I can't believe how fast time is flying by. I still feel great, and I've yet to wear maternity clothes. I'm still wearing my normal clothing, although my jeans are now held together by a hair tie. Physically, my only complaint would be the occasional insomnia. Other than that, I'm still carrying on my life as usual - working away, exercising before bed, going out and doing things when I feel like it. The only notable difference over the past couple weeks is the mood swings. This has been a relatively problem free pregnancy, but I did get moody for about 4-5 weeks during the first trimester and I think it's happening again. I've been getting frustrated and annoyed more easily than usual these days. In fact, the only thing that hasn't annoyed me over the past couple weeks is Dominic. Feeling him move or kick always brings a smile to my face no matter what kind of mood I'm in. Here's to hoping everyone else can put up with my grumpy ass over the next 10 weeks without locking me in a cage!

Still making progress by leaps and bounds for both businesses. Not quite where I want or need to be just yet, but everyday I see notable changes that keep me moving forward.  I can now see the light at the end of the tunnel, which is better than where I was 3 months ago! I've started looking more seriously into moving to San Diego. My goal is to move out of NY by spring, so now is as good a time as any to start checking out apartments and office space. At the very least, my search has given me an idea of what's out there and gives me something to look forward to. I'm excited to see where my little man and I will be in 6 months! "Success doesn't come to you. You go to it."

The Countdown Begins...

18 more weeks and counting until my due date! Can I get a "hell yeah" for being over half way? I'm thinking it would be really spectacular if Dominic decided to come about a week early so we were both home for Thanksgiving, as it's one of my favorite holidays. Unfortunately he'll come when he's ready, so all I can do is keep my fingers crossed. Regardless, the holiday season is going to be even more exciting this year with Dominic around. I know he won't be old enough to enjoy it or remember it, but I'm so excited to have him around for his first Christmas. This year will be such a drastic change from last Christmas, when for the first time ever in my life I sat home alone with my mom without a tree and without the usual family Christmas celebrations. Worst Christmas of my life, but I sucked it up and got through it. Just goes to show how things can really turn around in a years time. Speaking of which, what do you buy a 1 month old for Christmas? Hmm, guess I better start thinking of ideas...

I'm so glad some of my energy has finally returned over the past 2 weeks. For awhile, I was finding it difficult to even make myself get ready for the day, which is very uncharacteristic for me. I've been making progress by leaps and bounds on the marketing/advertising front for my boutique and consulting firm. I've revised my business plan and I have a very clear vision of where I want things to go over the next 6 months. I've been really motivated and inspired lately and I'm getting really excited for the big things that are coming. The only problem I'm still running into is finding decent salespeople. With running both businesses and doing all the advertising on my own, it's damn near impossible for me to do all the sales on top of the day to day stuff, networking, PR and marketing. Guess it's time to make some changes to the way I'm recruiting and training employees. If at first you don't succeed, try try again!  When all is said and done, if my hard work can make a difference in just one person's life, it will all be worth it.  "In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure."

Mama's a Slacker...

Baby mama has been a slacker this past week! From baseball games to the beach, ultrasounds and working like a madman I've had no time to do any updates the last couple days. First off, had my second trimester ultrasound today and Dominic is still a boy! Yeah!!! Huge sigh of relief. I couldn't help but laugh - every time the ultrasound tech put the ultrasound by his face, he started punching me. He's feisty already! The doctor says he looks great, is growing normally, doesn't have any red flags for any problems and is still on track to make his appearance on Turkey Day. They estimated his size to be about 11 ounces and 10 inches long. And he has the most adorable big old lips! I couldn't be happier. :)

Had a great time on a wee shopping spree today, compliments of Grandma. Was able to get the jogging stroller, baby bath and Boppy I wanted, in addition to clothes, shoes and various other items. I can't wait to see my little guy in his Converse All Stars. Thanks Grandma!

In the few (and far between) moments I do get for myself, I've been doing a lot of thinking. It's amazing how one little person can turn your whole world upside down in a matter of months. I'm on a mission to be the best damn mama on the face of the earth and that includes finding the perfect private school, the best life insurance policy and the nicest place to live. Changes are definitely coming. Haven't quite decided the where or when yet, but Dominic and I are going to take this world by storm - people beware! “Change is the essence of life. Be willing to surrender what you are for what you could become.”

Once Upon a Time...

Once upon a time there was a 23 year old girl named Blair. She lead an eventful life, busy focusing on her future, running two start up businesses and living the dream. She never imagined in her wildest dreams a place in her life for a baby. When one day, a routine doctors appointment brought a surprise - Blair had a baby on board! And that's where the story begins....

Hi everyone! Thanks for checking out my blog. As the intro stated, I'm Blair - a 23 year old business owner and single mama to be. I created the blog to give a little insight as to what it's like being  an expectant mother. A single expectant mother. A busy, ambitious single expectant mother. I hope that some of you will, at the very least, be able to relate the experiences I share here. And I'm looking forward to hearing stories from other women such as myself. But first, lets get everyone up to speed on how I got to where I am today...

In November/December of 2010, I started casually dating a guy we'll call SJ. He was close friends and co-workers with one of my best friends husbands, so I had seen him around a few times. My expectations of him and our relationship weren't high from the get-go because I didn't think we had much in common. Nevertheless, I thought he would be someone fun to hang out with and so began the saga. After hanging out a couple times and  enjoying his company, I realized I liked spending time with him and that we had more in common than I had anticipated. SJ appeared to be intelligent, have a good sense of humor and seemed to be a great dad to his 4 year old daughter from a previous relationship. Over the course of a few months, we began talking everyday, going to events together and getting closer. We weren't dating exclusively but it was clear that both of us were quite fond of one another. We shared similar values, talked about life, had fun together, laughed together and on one occassion even cried together. Yep, things were going great...

And then, in early April I found out I was expecting and that the baby was due November 24, 2011. It came as a huge  shock because I had been on birth control for over two years. When I initially told SJ, he was relatively calm and collected but it was clear he would rather not have a child. After several days of consideration, I told him I would be keeping the child and that I didn't expect anything from him but to be there for the baby. I wasn't asking anything of him financially, I wasn't trying to trap him into a relationship, I just wanted our baby to know his father. At first, he handled the news well. But over the course of a couple weeks, the person I thought I knew completely disappeared. He decided that it was in his (and somehow the child's) best interest if he was not around and was allowed to sign over all rights. I was shocked. Although the situation wasn't planned or ideal for either of us, I was baffled at how he could be such a good dad to one child and a deadbeat to another. Especially considering he grew up without a dad and had mentioned on several occassions how much contempt he had for his father for not being around.  I thought perhaps he was just in shock and over time he might come around....

Sadly, that was not the case. For about a month I continued to send him doctors updates on the baby until one day a few weeks ago things took a turn for the worse. As if being an absentee father wasn't enough, he began making cruel remarks towards me. This was the point when I decided that indeed he was right and that his being in our child's life would not be best for the child. He's not the type of influence I want for my child. And if he's not in 100% then he's not in at all. Once my bundle of joy arrives in November, we will be honoring his wish and allowing him to sign over all rights. "Anyone can be a father, but it takes a special person to be a dad"

Found out two weeks ago, I'm having a boy - Dominic Anthony Stephen! The prospect of being a single mom is challenging and scary at times, but also very exciting and rewarding. I am so greatful to have such wonderful family and friends to support me in one of the most integral and amazing times in my life. Dominic has been moving for a few weeks now and I love it! I can't wait to see him and hold him and kiss him. I can only hope he doesn't decide to greet us in the middle of Thanksgiving dinner ha ha!

To be continued....